A guy shorter than a head - is it worth being friends? Does growth affect relationships? Why is the height of a man so important for women Does the height of a man affect

Napoleon and Hitler, Goebbels, Stalin - they were all aggressive little guys. If you, like most of humanity, believe in the stereotypical idea that short people acquire an inferiority complex from childhood and therefore bear resentment towards the whole world, which often manifests itself in the form of aggressive behavior, then these examples clearly show that short men really feel their inadequacy and assert themselves through aggressive actions

Are generally accepted ideas correct or are they just delusions and prejudices? Whether there is a Napoleon complex and how height affects the character of a man is described in an excerpt from the book by Jeff Rolls “Women can not park, and men cannot pack! Psychology of stereotypes.

Psychologist Alfred Adler (1870-1937) was the first to use the term "Napoleon complex" to describe an inferiority complex that is believed to affect short men, causing them to become overactive in various areas of human activity. However, in the case of Napoleon, the facts were misinterpreted: 5ft 6in was not considered so short in his era—Napoleon simply looked small compared to the above-average soldiers of the French Imperial Guard.

This fact, along with evidence from many more general studies in this area, suggests that the "short male syndrome" is a fabrication. Nevertheless, this stereotype is firmly rooted in our minds.

With the increasing availability of plastic surgery and numerous other means designed to make our appearance more attractive, our height remains perhaps one of the last aspects of appearance that we cannot change. Our interest in human height becomes an obsession - this illustrates the attention of the general public to the growth of Tom Cruise, whose photo you can see here. But why is there such an obsession at all? Let's start by looking at the benefits that high growth seems to provide.

Self esteem level

Many studies suggest that taller people tend to earn more money- as the most good example just look at professional American basketball players. However, even in the 'real world', each additional inch of growth can generate an additional £500 a year in income (Heineck, 2004). This pattern seems to be true for both men and women. It often turns out that when two twin sisters are of different heights, the taller one earns more. What is the psychological basis for this pattern? Can we explain these results? Does taller height increase a person's self-esteem, or is the success of tall people a consequence of how we treat them ourselves?

A team of economists from the Universities of Pennsylvania and Michigan found that tall men who were relatively short in high school earned the same as short men, while short men who were relatively tall in high school earned as much. the same as tall men (Persico et al. 2003). This result suggests that the level of self-esteem corresponding to the level of wages cannot be considered a consequence of height discrimination at the present time; apparently, it is more related to the growth of a person in adolescence. The researchers concluded that high students considered themselves leaders and achieved much greater success in extracurricular activities. Since success breeds success, the tall students continued to stride through life with confidence, despite the fact that their shorter comrades over time caught up with them in stature.

Further support for this stereotype was provided by Anna Case and Christina Paxson, economists at the Center for Health and Social Well-being at Princeton University, who published an article with a striking conclusion: “On average, taller people earn more because they are smarter” (Case and Paxson, 2006). Their study was based on data from the US and the UK and confirmed the findings of other researchers that tall men and women earn 10% more than their counterparts who hold similar positions but are 4 inches shorter.

In addition, census charts suggest that 6'2" Americans are 3% more likely to be in leadership positions than 5'10" Americans. And again, explanations of this regularity should be sought in more early years and in the social position that today's men, being in their youth, may or may not have acquired due to confidence or uncertainty in their abilities.

A child who is growing rapidly adolescence, is more likely to gain self-confidence and develop a higher cognitive ability than a child who begins to grow later or less noticeably. The researchers argue that “as early as three years of age—before school comes into play—and throughout childhood, taller children perform significantly better on cognitive tests.” Case and Paxon conclude:

Tall children are more likely to become tall adults. Taller adults are more likely to choose high-paying jobs that require better speaking and numeracy skills and higher intelligence, and it is the development of these qualities that provides decent rewards. In addition, we show that taller adults choose occupations that place higher demands on cognitive skills and lower demands on physical work skills.

Case and Paxon, 2006

Both growth and cognitive (thinking) skills are affected by the most obvious and most controllable of all variables: nutrition. It is possible that proper care for a child at an early age, including the perinatal period, allows you to increase his future growth and provide him with higher cognitive abilities. Apart from proper nutrition, in childhood, we have few other opportunities to control the growth of the child. But since the release of a new study showing that tall people are more affluent and happier - and some believe even smarter - some parents in the US have begun demanding growth hormones for their children.

Nicola Persico and colleagues conducted a cost-benefit analysis showing that such expensive treatment is well worth it in terms of creating conditions for higher incomes (Persico et al., 2003). Perhaps soon injections of growth hormones will be considered as an acceptable medical intervention, similar to the introduction of drugs. But, as Persico points out, if everyone starts increasing their height, then we will constantly have to take more and more serious measures to ensure that our growth is above average - this will require "raising the bar" in the literal sense.

But it's not just wages that increase with growth. There is also a relationship between height and ability to play a leadership role - although since then

as the role of leader began to provide higher rewards, these two indicators are closely related. Many books point out that taller U.S. presidential candidates always win - this is not entirely true, although since 1928 only four out of 21 election campaigns have been won by a shorter candidate (Richard Nixon in 1972, Jimmy Carter in 1976 and George Bush in 2000 and 2004). Perhaps because American politicians are aware of the importance of the president's height index (which predicts election results based on a candidate's height), many candidates are thought to exaggerate their actual height. It might be interesting to find out the height of the heels of their shoes, and how they can mislead the electorate! It was no surprise to political observers who take into account the growth factor of the contenders that Barack Obama, who is 6ft 1in, scored such a landslide victory in 2008 over the smaller John McCain, who was only 5ft 6in.
So far, we've talked about how high growth is an indicator of leadership potential.

However, Daniel Nettle of the Open University (Nettle, 2002) found that taller men are considered more attractive and, as a result, more likely to have offspring. His analysis of 10,000 people born in Britain during one week in March 1958 showed that a taller than average man (6 feet) was more likely to have children than a man of average height (5 feet 10 inches). Women, on the other hand, were more likely to marry and have children if they were shorter than the average height of 5 feet 3 inches.

Are short men more aggressive than tall men?

Thus, being tall seems to provide men with an advantage in many ways. But what about the stereotype that short men are more aggressive than tall men? The Aggression Study Group at the University of Central Lancashire, led by Mike Asley and Dominique Ritter, did a remarkable experiment to explore this stereotype (Easlea and Ritter, 2007). Ten men under 5 feet 5 inches and ten men above average height participated in a study to test their physical abilities, such as hand-eye coordination, reaction time, and a few others.

In reality, they were taking part in a game designed to test their aggressiveness. To begin with, they were seated in pairs and connected to a monitor that monitors the work of the heart. They were then asked to play a game with chopsticks. In accordance with its rules, each player had to try to hit his opponent with his stick as quickly as possible, who had to dodge the attacker's blows and try to save his "weapon": in fact, they fenced with chopsticks.

Secretly from one member of his opponent's pair, he was asked to specifically strike at the opponent's knuckles. The experimenters measured the physiological parameters of the participants' reactions to such a provocation. The results showed that short participants were less likely to become aggressive than tall participants. These results disproved the validity of the Napoleonic stereotype.

Mike Asley concluded that short men are not more aggressive - in fact, the opposite was true. However, when people see the aggressive behavior of a short man, they attribute it to the height of this man, since this physical parameter is the most obvious.

The underlying reasons for the aggression of taller men are attributed to the influence of many other factors specific to the particular situation.

"Short Man Syndrome"

We can say with certainty that the existence of the “short man syndrome”, which makes short men stereotypically perceived as aggressive, is not supported by the results of research. As you know, Gandhi was only 5 feet 3 inches tall, and it was difficult to find a less aggressive person in the world than him.

For every Hitler there is Saddam Hussein (6ft 2in), for every Napoleon there is Idi Amin (6ft 4in), and for every Stalin there is Osama bin Laden (6ft 4in), and they are all tall men with equally aggressive tendencies. Think also of such handsome shorties as Ronnie Corbet, Mickey Rooney and Ernie Weiss, whom we can hardly call dictators. Men of short stature sometimes really have less chance of success - and, from their point of view, much less.

But in reality they are no more aggressive than their higher counterparts. Perhaps it's time to give the shorties a chance - and provide a special stand to climb the corporate ladder.

Long-established stereotypes suggest that a man should occupy a dominant role in the family. This means that he must be older, smarter, more successful, stronger and taller than his other half. But is it always like this in real life? Quite often you can see couples where the guy is lower than the girl.

Perception from the outside

In some couples, the difference in height can be quite insignificant and not visually evident. In others, a girl can be much taller than her boyfriend. As practice shows, others may not even pay attention to the difference in height, if the couple itself does not feel embarrassed because of this. Even when a lady is much taller than her boyfriend and also wears high heels, which increases the difference by another 6-10 cm, this does not make the couple ridiculous and ridiculous, but says that everything is in order in their relationship.

Girl behavior

Girls are usually dissatisfied with the physical data of their young man under public pressure. When friends and mother tell a girl that her boyfriend is short, what is better when a man is taller than his companion. The lady begins to try to visually hide this defect. She stops wearing high heels and begins to slouch, trying to appear shorter. But from the side there is a feeling of pretense. Embarrassment and attempts to appear lower are very striking. In such cases, the couple may look inharmonious, even if the guy is only a couple of centimeters shorter than the girl.

Growth specifics

Most complexes originate in childhood and adolescence. Girls up to a certain age develop more rapidly than boys. By the senior classes, boys begin to grow faster, surpassing girls. But this doesn't happen to everyone. In many ways, genes play a decisive role. When everyone in the family is short, it is difficult to expect that a basketball player will grow out of a son. Children who spend many years together, studying in the same class and communicating with each other, do not stop being friends because of differences in height. Friendly companies are made up of joint interests in which physical data is hardly decisive. That is why it cannot be assumed that if a guy is shorter than a girl, then their relationship is doomed to failure. If the relationship does not work out, then for other reasons.

At the same time, problems with self-esteem do not arise in young people who are open and sociable by nature. Growth for them will not be a problem for realizing their potentials and finding a place in life.

If a young man himself is very shy and cannot find common language with people, then it is more difficult for him to find his place in life. In addition, if in the family he is constantly criticized, including for physical imperfections, then there will be plenty of complexes and self-doubt. In order not to be a failure, you need to work on yourself. Develop those qualities that were given by nature. It has been proven that short men can better adapt to different life situations. In addition, it is important to understand for yourself that if a guy is lower than a girl, this is normal. Career success can be a great boost to self-esteem. The more self-confidence, the greater the chance of success.

Fallacy or truth

Are all girls really looking for tall men? In fact, as studies and polls show, not everyone likes it when a partner is significantly taller. Girls next to such gentlemen sometimes feel uncomfortable. Not everyone wants to feel like little and defenseless girls next to a big uncle. Many ladies say that it is much better when both partners have approximately the same height in a pair, while it can differ both in one direction and in the other.

But if we talk about the difference in height, it may seem that we are talking exclusively about squat men, which is wrong, since girls can sometimes be very tall. And if they choose a mate for themselves from men whose height exceeds the two-meter mark, it is far from a fact that even if such a person exists, he will also meet the other requirements of the lady. Therefore, if a guy is shorter than a girl, this is normal, and many do not even pay attention to it.

When there are feelings

If people are drawn to each other and there are mutual interests, then they will not pay attention to physical data. By the way, to start a relationship, you need to get to know each other. And for this you need to pay attention to a specific person. For this to happen, it must be different from others. For example, emotional manifestations that attract people, and charisma. Or, conversely, sadness and immersion in their own thoughts. The image of a person consists of many parts. Clothing, hairstyle, physical data - all this is perceived as a whole, in conjunction with the manner of communication.

But when feelings pass, dissatisfaction and irritation appear, then every little thing will be a disadvantage. Even those qualities that were virtues yesterday, today will seem like the most serious minuses.

Short stature is not a sentence for a man

It is believed that tall young people are more interested in girls than their short counterparts. In fact, one only has to look at the list of famous "shorty" women to understand that height cannot be blamed for problems with the female sex. Charm, charisma, emancipation - what attracts girls more than high growth.

Couples in which the guy is lower than the girl meet all the time. Sometimes it's not mother nature's fault, but the fashion for high heels. Moreover, taking off her shoes, the lady may be even lower than her gentleman. Therefore, the difference in height can be very changeable. Men who are proud of their fair half are often not embarrassed at all because she is taller.

Benefits of being short

The short ones, represented by the strong half of humanity, have several serious advantages. They usually dance better because they have more control over their bodies. They also often surpass their two-meter counterparts in intimate life. At the same time, height and physical form are two completely different things. Therefore, it is possible to acquire beautiful muscles even for a short young man. A beautiful male figure always attracts attention.

The lack of growth makes the young man compensate for this complex. That is why such people are ambitious, they often achieve a lot in life. Do girls like short guys? Yes, often they are more attentive to the girl they like, they are considered very good boyfriends. And many claim that they are very good and faithful husbands.

How does a girl look shorter

If a lady tends to perceive her taller height as a disadvantage, you can use several tricks to make it less conspicuous: give up shoes with heels and choose models on flat sole. You should not do high hairstyles.

What if the guy is shorter than the girl and she doesn't really like it? You need to pay attention to your wardrobe and make some adjustments to it. Clothes with vertical stripes have no place in it. Tight models of skirts and dresses make the girl visually taller. If you want to appear lower, you should give preference to loose styles. Bright accessories: a wide belt, an unusual bag, extravagant shoes - catch the eye well. Therefore, few people pay attention to growth. A young man can wear shoes on a small platform, which will make him a couple of centimeters taller.

The easiest way to hide the fact that the guy is shorter than the girl is a photo taken using small tricks. For example, a girl might take a step down if the couple takes a picture on the stairs.

No matter how many girls argue about their preferences and dream of tall handsome men who will always wear them in their arms and bring a lot of love and money into their lives, reality confirms that everything is almost never combined in one gentleman. positive traits. And ideals change over the years and experience. But when a guy is shorter than a girl and for some of them this is a problem, then this suggests that people are not suitable for each other.

Many women suffer from imperfections in appearance. But tell that to the short guys! That's who suffered because of the girl's rejection: "You're good, but ...!" Psychologist-publicist Elena Loseva lists what makes us doubt the success of a relationship if a man does not come out tall.

perfectionism

Perfectionism causes most men to reject already at the first stage of assessing appearance. Passive search drags on for years, when we are looking, first of all, not for a like-minded person, a reliable half, but for an outwardly suitable person. And almost the first remark in this regard is: “He must be taller than me!”

To whom it owes is not specified - no one has identified the specific inconvenience that will arise with a difference in height in favor of a woman in a pair. That is, you refuse relationships not because of centimeters, but because of an empty, in fact, installation ... Dangerous moment! In this case, insidious perfectionism can be crushed only by the ability to think logically and ... empirically.

What happens if you start dating a guy you like who is shorter? It may very well be that gradually its growth will be perceived as normal. You will also be surprised: why does everything around now seem to be “big-tails”? It's simple: your perfectionism has adapted to the situation. Now the ideal is nearby, just turn your head (and don’t lift it up - it’s inconvenient!), And all the rest are knocked out of the template.

Dependence on the opinions of others

Can you imagine how you bring the chosen one to the company and the family to get acquainted, who is shorter than you and ... internally shrink from horror? Blimey! It turns out that you can step on the throat of your own song because of the (not even sounded yet!) thoughtless word of loved ones. But why? This, of course, needs to be dealt with.

A couple with a height difference will certainly attract more attention. But the first thing people feel when they see such a tandem is by no means negative, but just surprise, interest. And although the first reaction is the most involuntary (many equate this with “honest”), it is also the most easily changed.

Yes, they will most likely talk about you. But if the relationship you demonstrate turns out to be head and shoulders above the others ... stories about how tall Masha and stocky Kolya live in perfect harmony will very soon acquire a romantic and admiring color. It's nice. That is, a non-standard difference in height will work for a couple, and not against.

Dissatisfaction with one's own appearance

Oh, these own "extra" centimeters and kilograms! If they stubbornly scream about themselves from the mirror, a taller and larger man is sought as an accessory that will hide "shortcomings". Indeed, against the background of this, any one will automatically become Thumbelina.

First, it won't. Secondly, choosing a life partner as a "background" is a losing strategy. Hear the wake-up call: obsession with own appearance prevents you from seeing more important prospects for living together. And yes, start it.

These are complexes due to appearance, and not the non-standard height of a man who shows interest in you, prevents you from developing in terms of personal happiness. And they are eliminated thanks to the admiration of another person. And if this one appeared next to you, try to concentrate not on how “down” you look at him, but on how he “highlights” your best sides with his eyes!

lack of confidence in a man

Of course. A man should look like this to scare a saber-toothed tiger if they suddenly make a mistake in a cave: a lump! Power! This image, alas, is rarely associated with a short guy. As, however, with the fact that modern woman voices, speaking of a potential chosen one: “To understand, be able to listen and hear, show sympathy for my problems,” and so on and so forth.

But it is precisely the medium-sized men who, by virtue of their physique, are inclined from childhood to the ability to negotiate, and do not consider diplomacy something unworthy.> In addition, in everyday life they do not miss the chance to demonstrate their masculinity and real strength: they often notice that the lady pulls" a heavy bag and may suffer from a crookedly hanging chandelier - and intervene in a timely manner.

While tall men have not trampled us for this laudatory song, we will mention that in the category of +/-160 cm you can also run into an aggressor who takes out anger for non-standard height on someone who is weaker. But the symptoms of painful self-doubt will almost certainly appear even at the stage of courtship, so let's not talk about the sad, but concentrate on the good.

What if you are taller than a man?

Nothing. Nothing at all! And let the magazines give at least a million tips about clothes with stripes in the right direction, photo tricks on the steps and other nonsense that reinforces the public position: "A man lower is wrong."

Let's already dress how we like and pose together for pictures for ourselves and not for others. And to questions from “classic” couples, where the woman is shorter than the man, like: “You have such a difference in height, doesn’t it bother you?” - respond provocatively and unexpectedly:

A study by specialists from New York showed that the success of men in various areas of life is directly related to their growth. It turned out that taller men are more successful in their careers - 90% of company executives have growth above average, and their income, respectively, is higher than that of others.

At the same time, short men compensate for the lack of growth with high incomes, but if they meet tall rivals at work, they will become more successful in their careers.

As for relationships with women, tall men marry much more often, but the divorce rate among such couples is also high. Moreover, marriage often breaks up due to the incompatibility of ages and outlooks on life, since men are guided more by the external data of the chosen one. It is interesting that tall men most often choose young girls as their wives, and they earn more than their soul mates, the FAN agency reports.

Men, whose height is below average, when choosing a partner, look more at the character and temperament of a woman. They often choose a companion of the same height as themselves and the same age.